Tammy Haider on Finding Yourself Through Music
Tammy opens up about finding herself again after crises through brand new single 'You Will Always Follow You"
You are about to release a new single, 'You will always follow you" on 2 September. Tell us about the track and what it means to you? I appreciated the chance to hear it before it's released. I really enjoyed the expansive instrumentation and the big chorus that lingers on in my head.
The track started off feeling like it was about someone else, someone always running away from things they can't face up to in themselves. Over the course of time the sentiment started to seem more universal, running away from ourselves is something we all do to some extent even though we struggle to admit it. We change something because we believe it'll take us where we want to be but when we get to that 'place' we might seem a little different but are still essentially the same person we've always been with our own unique hang ups and quirks. Recently I realised how much I relate to this song and I had a strange inkling that the whole time I may have been writing about myself and just not realised it. In a way it has been cathartic to come clean and admit this, making way for healthier self acceptance of who I am (hopefully it does that for the listener too). I'm glad to have shared it with you prior to it's release and that you enjoyed the instrumentation. I'm happy with where we took and the more expansive feel it has to it now.
The first single ‘Leo’, which you released in November last year is a real emotional heart on your sleeve pop/folk song. It's subtle, laid back and delivered with the confidence of someone who has really honed their craft. What's the response been so far for this track and is it indicative of what's to come?
The response has been quite nice. I mean it's weird putting songs out in the world, you're never really sure what will happen or who will dig it but I've received lovely feedback about 'Leo' and am quite proud of that song.
This digital age makes it difficult in some ways to know how much 'reach' a song has once it gets out into the world so I try to comfort myself with the notion that my music will eventually reach the right ears
I do think 'Leo' is indicative of what's to come, I have been writing songs for a while now and on my new album I really focused on distilling the emotional content of each song and saying what I felt within the song needed to be said, more so than in the past. I do tend to obsess about songs as I am writing them, waking up in the middle of the night mulling over specific words till they fit and feel right, but the writing process for the songs on my new album was much more relaxed and more about collaboration. I wasn't just holed up in my room writing, well I was a little bit :) I was taking bits of songs to weekly jamming sessions with friends as they were being written and then taking them home and tweaking the arrangements with my partner. I became and was much more transparent with my songwriting process, unafraid to show bits of music and lyrics to those around me before they were 'songs'. It was a really enjoyable process of bouncing ideas around and I think this energy and confidence is reflected in the songs themselves.
Outside of music what are the things that you put your energy into?
I like making art and am quite into collage. I have also started working with ink, forming my own shapes overlapping them until I am satisfied and adding elements of collage and pastel when suitable. This idea is only in it's beginning stages and will require more development. I am hoping to create images that leave the viewer (as well as the artist) with a feeling of calmness and serenity. I started a Masters of Teaching this year and am taking a break from it to focus on other projects such as an old, quite rundown house in the country that we recently bought and are fixing up. I also like making videos but lately have felt a bit bogged down by the technology of it all, I don't like spending hours working out how to use programs, I want to spend less time on computers not more.
You spent four years in Berlin after your band Royalchord finished up. It sounds like such a wonderful opportunity. Tell us about that experience and what you got out of it?
Just to clarify Royalchord finished up towards the end of my time in Berlin and my time there was in many ways magical and difficult. I saw that it was possible to exist as an artist but that this existence was not an easy one. We had a proper studio where we could record and practice and I recorded some of my first solo EP 'Genuine Feeling' there. Just having a space to make music in at all hours meant there was no limit or constraints to your creativity and songwriting.
My eyes were open to a world full of artists and musicians, and coming from Australia it was mind blowing to see and be in a place with so much creativity but also where there was a deep respect for the arts. I hadn't thought of being an artist as an occupation but I could see in Berlin it was possible as the whole of Europe was geographically accessible. Also the opportunities open to one just by virtue of being there were amazing, we got to play at festivals and offered support slots that I just don't think would have come so easily here. The experience of being there in many ways was the catalyst for me finally getting around to doing the solo thing, it gave me a strength and belief in my abilities I'm not sure I would have had had I stayed in Australia. I guess the experience made me become serious and have some conviction about forging my own musical path.
What are your plans from here with the upcoming album? Your last album was in 2017 so I am wondering if this next album has been a longer journey than expected?
It has very much been a longer journey between albums than expected. After I put out 'The One' I had a bit of a crisis of faith, unsure I wanted to play music anymore. This went on for a few years, during the whole lockdown period I think I barely picked up an instrument. I did (as I think we all did) some pretty heavy soul searching during those lockdown years and focussed my energy on other things like completing a Visual Arts degree, throwing myself into art making and my studies as well as spending time tending to my garden and growing vegetables. I became very into watching things grow. Up until 'The One' was released I hadn't really taken a break from music, I kind of went straight from Royalchord ending to working on my solo material and pushing that. I needed to take stock and to be honest I wasn't sure I had the drive to keep doing music. A chance encounter with my friend Amanda (who sings on 'You Will Always Follow You' and my new album) led to a jam and from that I realised how much I had missed making music. I hadn't felt like myself for those few years and suddenly I was myself again. For over a year we jammed every week.
Music is such a connecting force between people and for me suddenly making music again and tapping into something greater than myself was very affirming. It sparked in me the will to write songs again as I had people to play them with.
This eventually led to the recording of my upcoming album, Castrati Meow, the majority of which was recorded live.
Finally, who are your favourite local Melbourne bands at the moment or who would you like to see interviewed for Tempo?
I really like Redspencer, Roland, Molly Mckew and the Orbweavers. I've also been meaning to sit down and listen to the new Alluvial Nuggets album and Water Signs EP. I recently saw Coda Chroma which was awesome and her new songs are brilliant.
Single Launch ‘You Will Always Follow You’
Saturday 21 Sep
4pm
Tramway Hotel
Support from Roland
